Secluded Barbary Beach is just one of many scenic beaches on the island of Grand Bahama. Photo: Carol Perehudoff
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Reality beats reality TV as our intrepid – but horse-challenged – Bachelorette copycat takes the plunge
Grand Bahama, The Bahamas – Am I on
The Bachelorette or is this a bad case of TV deja vu?
The
pale aqua ocean, deserted beach and sleek black horse all look
strangely familiar. My lithe female guide, Leo, the owner of Trikk
Pony, confirms it.
Secluded Barbary Beach on Grand Bahama,
the fourth-largest island in the Bahamian archipelago, is where
Bachelorette DeAnna rode horses with Jesse on
The Bachelorette Season 4, and I'm about to re-create the ride.
The
only thing is, I'm not sure I want to. When I'd originally signed up
I'd misunderstood the program and thought I'd be swimming with
seahorses.
When I found out it was swimming
in the sea with horses, I almost canceled, then reconsidered – surely I'm over my fear of horses by now.
My issues with riding began when a horse in Cappadocia, Turkey, tried to maim me.
An imperious mare who'd hated me on sight, she'd head into stiff
dead trees in the hopes of poking out one of my eyes. It was so bad, I
ended up switching horses with another trail rider, and the minute I
got on that horse it ran into someone's garden.
Who wouldn't be emotionally scarred?
In a weird
Bachelorette coincidence, only one other person is riding, a Bahamian man named Andre.
He's
on Nifty, Jesse's ex-mount, a small, brown gelding with gentle eyes. My
horse – or should I say, DeAnna's – is taller and shuffles on dainty
feet as I approach.
"This is BB, short for Black Beauty." Leo pats her neck. "She's been a real princess ever since the
Bachelorette."
I have a sudden flashback. "Wait, didn't she take off with DeAnna?"
Leo hoists me up. "She was just upset because her routine was disrupted because of all the retakes."
I
promise BB I won't saddle her with retakes if she doesn't bolt. I've
worked hard to overcome my fear and don't need any setbacks.
First
came a trip through the Australian Outback on a cow horse named
Jughead, who loved me but never listened to a word I said. Then came
equine therapy at Ste. Anne's Spa near Grafton, Ont.
(www.steannes.com), where I'd spent three intensive days in a battle of
wills with a horse named Boomer.
The program teaches you
about yourself and your interactions with others, and what I learned is
that my leadership skills are deeply buried.
It took two
long days before Boomer walked where I wanted him to go and I
considered it a triumph – now I'm over my fear of male horses.
So,
how am I going to coax a princess into the sea? Keeping in mind what
I'd learned in equine therapy – that neither demanding nor begging gets
results – I try to exude a calm confidence as we set off down the
flour-pale beach.
Barbary Beach is gorgeous, all right.
Tendrils of railroad vines crawl along the sand and a warm wind ruffles
casuarina trees and silver-toned, sea lavender bushes.
I relax enough to ply Leo for
Bachelorette gossip.
"It was supposed to be a romantic scene with DeAnna and Jesse leaning
in for a kiss," she says. "Only Nifty didn't want to be beside BB
because he's in love with Heidi."
I look at little Nifty
with renewed admiration. DeAnna and Jesse didn't work out but Nifty's
love for Heidi has stayed strong, especially touching considering she's
27 and he's 12. Evidently, cougar love doesn't only exist in the cat
world.
As we near a rocky promontory, Leo slows her horse.
"Okay, we're going in."
I look out at the windswept Atlantic. "Like straight in?"
"Right."
She and her horse push forward. Tensely, I nudge BB's sides. She
hesitates. The familiar fear rises up in me, the gearing up for a
battle of wills, but an interesting thing happens. I see my fear, but
it's a hollow husk of emotion. What I'm really feeling is ...
excitement.
I nudge BB again and she plunges ahead. Green
water swallows us up. First my feet disappear, then my legs until I'm
waist deep and we're moving in a methodical rhythm against the warm
waves.
Behind me, Andre has a huge grin on his face and I
give him a thumbs up. This might not be a TV romance, but it's surreal
crazy fun. I'm floating through the ocean and it does sort of feel as
if I'm riding a seahorse. Not only have I overcome my fear, I've
learned something else – reality beats reality TV.
Read Carol Perehudoff's blog at www.wanderingcarol.com
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