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Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles Last Updated: Feb 13, 2017 - 1:48:09 PM
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Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
Parenting and Favoritism - Apr 23, 2010 - 1:30:18 PM

Parenting provides the greatest opportunity to impact the world by impacting children.  God graciously placed children in the hands of parents, totally helpless, empty brain (knowledge), prejudice free and emotionally entangled free.  Thus the journey begins for dad and mom to mold and equip each child to succeed before God and in a cruel, unrestrained world of people. 

Parents are to unconditionally and totally embrace each child equally, but not necessarily parent each child in the same manner; the personality of the child determines the style of parenting needed. Nevertheless, there is however; a common, destructive, behavior that has almost become part and parcel of parenting, and it is favoritism.  Before listing the negative results of favoritism...

Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
Tips to improve your life and your relationships - Apr 7, 2010 - 11:56:21 AM

Socrates once said, “An unexamined life is not worth living.”  An unexamined life will never reach its full potential because faults will not be seen and adjustments not made.  Throughout the scriptures persons are called to examine their current state for improvement.  When persons are challenged to improve their quality of life it is often thought of as improvement in the material possession owned, but true quality enchantment is character development.  Practices of the following will, without doubt, enhance your life.

From John 10:10:

1.   Work on your most obvious fault.  Luke 6:41;  2.   Own your feelings.  Proverbs 25:28;   3.   Stop blaming others for your actions or reactions...

Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
The Blended Family - Jan 21, 2010 - 12:38:50 PM

The blended family will become, if not already, the standard model of the family in the western world. What is a blended family? The author describes the blended family as one where the children associated with the marriage are related biologically to only one parent. These children can be adults or minors.

The main contributors to the formation of blended families are second marriages, single parents marrying to one other than the child’s biological parent and adoptions. A sad fact about blended families is the success rate is not as good as the non-blended families. The good news however is, by adequately addressing key issues one of two things will happen. The first possible outcome is no marriage because by addressing these pertinent areas the only sensible course of action is to STOP...
Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
Developing Healthy Relationships as a Stepparent - Part 2 - Jan 5, 2010 - 1:55:54 PM

One of the most challenging and complicated problems facing families today is the issue of developing and maintaining healthy relationships with stepchildren. Undoubtedly, many new spouses must feel, upon entering into a stepfamily situation, that they are suddenly expected to act like Superman and "leap tall buildings with a single bound."

Teach and model repentance and forgiveness in your relationships

Joshua once said, "As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord" (Joshua 24:15). Are you proclaiming this to your children by your words and by your actions? To what extent are you willing to go to make this a reality?

Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
Developing Healthy Relationships as a Stepparent - Part 1 - Dec 30, 2009 - 9:32:52 AM

One of the most challenging and complicated problems facing families today is the issue of developing and maintaining healthy relationships with stepchildren. Undoubtedly, many new spouses must feel, upon entering into a step family situation, that they are suddenly expected to act like Superman and "leap tall buildings with a single bound."

Though stepfamilies may look like traditional nuclear families on the outside, the dynamics on the inside are very different. Two completely unique family cultures, two completely different sets of traditions, two completely different ways of dealing with issues must now reach happy (or at least peaceful) coexistence in one family.

Think about it: Roles for everyone are jumbled and confused … responsibilities are not clear cut as they usually are in a traditional family …

Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
The Power of Connection - Dec 18, 2009 - 9:23:22 PM

Healthy connections are essential for healthy relationships.  This connection is called intimacy, and contrary to how most think, it is not synonymous with sex although sex is a component of intimacy.  Here are a few words that comprise a working definition of intimacy: closeness, togetherness, friendship, understanding, affection and tenderness.   Every person needs connection (intimacy) because God created humans to connect.  It has been proven that a new born baby may die if there is no nurturing contact with others.  A person who is appropriately connected through significant relationships is well on the way to leading a fulfilled and rewarding life.   

As human beings we long for connection to the point that many tolerate and make effort to sustain obviously unhealthy relationships just for some source of connection...

Columns : Relationships Matter - Cedric Beckles
The Quality of a Person’s Life is Determined by the Quality of His Relationships - Dec 10, 2009 - 2:26:12 PM

When one thinks of a quality life, almost invariably, money, possessions, and status are some of the things in the forefront of ones thoughts.  To some extent the things mentioned do add a significant measure of quality to ones life, but beyond this the non-tangibles essentials needed to bring ultimate qualities to ones life can only come from healthy relationships.

Do relationships matter and are they impacting?  Unhealthy, dysfunctional relationships are stressful, peace disrupters, sleep inhibitor, emotionally exhausting, physically dangerous (abusive) and mentally disruptive, all of which contributes to physical ailments.  On the other hand, healthy, functional relationships bring stability, joy, happiness, emotional and physical connection, sense of wellbeing, enhance self-worth,  and contentment just to name a few... 

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